Forget the viagra, I’ll take the money!

Most of the time it just sits there in the background, soaking up all the nasty spam and rubbish which would otherwise clutter up my inbox. But every now and then I like to open the Pandora’s Box that is my Junk E-mail folder, and read the contents just for laughs.
I quickly delete the unopened emails offering me discount viagra and pornographic links.
My biggest belly laughs come from the emails written by kind-sounding folk all over the world desperately wanting to drown me in money. According to my junk mail folder, 2010 has been a shocking year for air crashes in obscure African dictatorships, but a great year for me. I’ve been judged so trustworthy that several survivors want to give me a total of US$2,070,000 just to help them smuggle their millions out to my first world bank account.
Miss K, for one, tells me with ‘tears and sorrow’ that ‘my mind convinced me that you may be the true person to help me’. All she needs is my bank account number.
Then there are the lotteries. Talk about a lucky year! I’ve won US$5,750,000, GBP12,270,750, and 1,550,000 Euros in twelve lotteries - without even buying a ticket!
I’ve inherited US$1,388,327 from benefactors who’ve obviously heard of my deservedness and felt moved to leave their fortunes to a complete stranger.
Finally Western Union is holding US$800,000 until I can just give them some personal information to support my ‘calim’.
Converted to Aussie dollars, my total(ly fictitious) windfall would be worth AU$50,424,932, give or take…
What a Christmas that would make :- ))